My Salvation- A Usui Horokeu Love story- Chapter One- The First Visit
by November Illusion
Summary: This was originally a Ren story but it works both ways (The Ren copy is available its almost identical) P.S The description of the building is probably not what they are like, I've never been in one.
1. Chapter 1 The First Visit

My Salvation!

Chapter 1 First Visit

I told Ren I'd go and visit his sister in the loony bin, as he couldn't make his weekly visit, although I had no idea why I did agree... Maybe it was the threats he'd made, or the fact Pirika was travelling down as we speak

"Hi I'd like to visit Tao Rei." I told the woman at the reception.

She tapped in something's on her computer, I stood there patiently.

The place smelt like a hospital,

"Janet!" The woman called.

A small, short woman wearing a white coat came in.

"This man is here to see Rei."

"Oh yes right this way."

As I trailed down the hall after her all I could hear was screaming, shouting and whining.

She led me upstairs and down a long corridor, it was the door right at the end of the hall, no room next to it or opposite it, strange…

"Rei you have a visitor." The nurse said through the door.

"Who!" A voice demanded to know. "Is it Ren?"

"No it's not your brother it's another young man."

"Okay." She sighed.

The nurse opened the door.

"Panic button is by the bed." She whispered as if it was a secret.

I entered the room, a young girl sat on the bed rocking gently from side to side, if I didn't know any better I would have thought she was Ren, just her hair was slightly longer at the back.

"Hello." She greeted me not turning around.

"Hi, I'm Horohoro, Ren sent me."

"I miss him, how is my brother? I get worried when he misses visits, is he alright?" She asked me.

"Ren? He's alright Jun came down to visit and she's been bossing him about for the past two weeks."

"Eugh, she would, she loves Ren her baby brother, it's like I'm invisible to the family and only Ren can see me."

"Must suck but I'm here will that do?" I asked going around to look at her.

She looked at me, she gazed at my hair for a second.

"Cool hair."

"Thanks, I'm from the North."

"Bet its cold over there, colder than it is at night here." She mused, I smiled.

"Yeah a lot colder."

"Is that from the North?" She asked going to touch my arm.

But she pulled back and looked hesitantly at me.

"Yes it is, you want to try it on?" I asked unzipping my white snow jacket.

She nodded, I helped her into it.

She zipped it up.

"It's big and warm." She told me. "You won't be cold?"

"No, you seem cold though."

She was just as short as Ren.

"I bit warmer now, window doesn't close, staff no listen they say window closed but window open at night and make me cold."

I took a look at the window for her, she was right there was a draft, I opened it, there was something jammed in it stopping it from completely closing, I sorted it out before closing the window and no draft.

"The windows fixed." I smiled.

"No cold?" She asked hopefully.

"No cold."

She smiled slightly, I went to wash my hands.

"Are you leaving?" She asked as I walked past her.

"No I'm going to wash my hands."

"Bathroom there…" She pointed.

I turned on the tap a small dribble of water came out, no soap, I looked around a small space with a peach toilet and a peach coloured bath tub that had a lock on the taps, sighing I turned off the tap and dried my hands and went and sat next to her.

"Been a while since visits, what want to do?" She asked.

"Why don't you show me around out there?" I suggested.

"'Cause I don't go out there, door 'locked'."

"Why not?" I asked.

"People out there scary, people no like me; they grab me and scares me." She explained.

"What if we go out there together and walk around the garden?" I suggested.

"You won't leave me out there on own?"

"I'll stay with you I promise."

She nodded and stood up.

"You can hold on to my arm if you get scared."  
"I don't touch people, I'm cursed." She explained walking out of her room.

"Who told you that?"

"Tao En…"

We sat outside in the garden.

"What do you do for fun?" I asked.

"Sit in room and watch window." She answered flatly.

"Is that all?"

"Yeah." She confirmed.

How boring all day everyday watching out the window.

"Can you play cards?"

"Yeah."

She nodded, she led me back inside and walked me past the sitting room,

"Lookin' good Rei!" One of the other patients shouted.

She shuddered and quickened her pace.

Past the mess hall as she called it, Rei seemed to glare at the nurse that passed by us. to the activity room.

"That lady call me names, she call me three three seven but that's not my name." Rei told me trying to justifying her glare.

"Oh, then what is your name?" I questioned.

"Lei, I call me Rei."

"What do you want me to call you?" I asked, I didn't want her to think I was calling her names.

"Rei is nice."

"Ok Rei, let's go find a deck."

She nodded we found a deck and started playing,

"Ren no like this game, he says I'm no good." She told me halfway through our game of go fish.

She really looked up to Ren, she cared what he thought about her, cared whether he visited her or not.

"I like it." I reassured her.

I walked her back to her room.

Her dinner was waiting for her, she walked past it.

"You not going to eat?" I asked.

"No, you can eat it, Ren used to throw it out the window." She waved her hand as if it was poisonousness.

"How about we half it?" I suggested.

"Half it? Me eat half I don't know food pretty awful here some of it like plastic, some of it like mushy shit..."

"What about this?" I asked handing her the pot of jelly.

"Weird…" She shook the tub and shook it.

"No you eat it, very yummy."

"Horohoro half it?"

"Ok." I agreed sitting next to her on the bed.

I opened it and picked up the plastic spoon.

I scooped a small bit out and ate it.

"Rei's turn." She took the pot and dug the spoon in. "Is Ren only one that visited you?"

"Yeah, is Ren ok?"

"Ren is very busy, I'm sure he'll come."

"I don't mind I just get lonely without Ren's weekly visit, after all he is the one who put me in here, without him I have nothing to look forward to..." She told me.

"Well, why don't I come and visit you, once a week?"

"I don't want to bore you."

"I had fun."

"You did?" She asked sounding shocked.

"I really did."

It wasn't a lie.

She smiled.

"Sir, visiting hours are over." A voice called through the door.

"Right ok."

I stood up.

"Horohoro leaving?"

"Yeah but I'll be back."

"How do I know though?" She asked, her trust shattered by Horohoro's unexplained disappearance.

"My jacket!" I almost shouted which caught her attention. "You hold on to it until next week, ok?"

She watched me for a moment as if searching to see if I was lying.

"See you next week." I smiled waving goodbye.


	2. Chapter 2 Knowing You

Chapter 2 Getting To Know You

Rei's Pov-

I waited the days ticked by slowly I hugged his jacket now and then, it was so boring in my room.

At least my room wasn't cold anymore thanks to Horohoro.

I slipped the jacket on and dug my hands in the pockets, there was a piece of paper in there, I pulled it out.

I looked at it, it seemed fun I placed it on the desk and did some research on the maths on the sheet and day by day I started writing the answers to the twenty questions, it felt good to use my brain.

I'd just had my bath and gotten redressed and sat on my rock solid bed looking out the window.

My door opened.

"I'm not hungry." I told the nurse as it was lunch time.

"I'm not bringing you food." I heard his voice.

I turned around.

"Horohoro!"

"Hey Rei, how are you?"

"Good!" I smiled. "You?"

"Yeah I'm alright."

He sat next to me, I looked at him, his eyelids hung slightly lower than they did last week, his eyes looked dull and the slight hint of bags under his eyes made me believe he was sleep deprived.

"Horohoro you look sleepy…"

"I guess I am a little tired." He yawned.

"Get no sleep?"

He shook his head.

"I had a nightmare." He told me.

"About what? Having to visit me?" I joked.

"No, about my dad." He answered.

"Your dad not very nice?"

"No he's not, it's like-"

"A dark void that's grip is painful and keeps you locked in despair?" I asked him.

"Ye- wait what did you just say?" He questioned looking confused.

I looked away, panicking slightly, I decided to play dumb.

"Your dad not very nice?" I repeated.

"No, but on another subject I got you a gift."

"A-A gift?"

"The staff said I could give it to you, it was your birthday two days ago right?" Horohoro hid it behind his back. "But it's a gift so you have to close your eyes."

So I did.

Horohoro's Pov-

I held the stuffed panda out.

"Ok open."

"Oh it's so cute!" She beamed.

"So you like it?" I asked as she took it off me and gave it a hug.

She nodded.

"Thank you!"

I wondered what that comment was she'd made earlier, maybe if I could distract her while she talked she might say something similar.

"Oh you didn't happen to find a sheet of paper did you?" I asked.

"Yeah! It's on the desk I finished it." She told me.

I walked over and looked at it, she'd written on it, I looked a bit closer she'd worked out the answers, Ren's advanced math homework that I'd nicked off him and she'd solved it without being in the class, interesting…

"Shall we go play a game?" I asked.

"Sure!"

I asked one of the nurses what I was looking for,

He led us to a small room, with a desk and a box full of IQ testing toys.

I routed through the box I found two puzzles consisting of a cube of six colours, each face of which is made up of nine squares, eight of which are individually rotatable.

Perfect. I sat down and gave her one, I started playing with the other, she soon started solving the puzzle, at first she was just exploring twisting the cube for fun, and then she started realising what it really did.

"Do you ever have nightmares?" I asked casually, turning the cube.

"All the time, I often dream about someone drowning me in the bath or one of the more challenged people trying to rape me, that's why I don't come out of my room, they pinch and grab me, I told the staff but they ignored me." She told me fiddling with the cube.

"Must be worrying, must be hard to sleep at night."

"Not really, Ren wants to keep me in here forever, I'm going to die in here and there isn't anything I can do about it, so it doesn't matter to me anymore, nothing does."

"But why does he want to keep you here?"

"Because of what happened that day…" She trailed off.

She shook her head and placed the cube on the table.

"I'm finished." She told me standing up.

I looked at the cube she really had completed it.

I put the cubes back.

"Oh one more thing." I told her as she stood outside her room.

"Yes?" She asked.

"I thought you might want to read this, I found it interesting so I thought you might."

"I guess it wouldn't hurt to read it, it's not like I'm very busy these days…" She took the book. "I mean thank you."

"That's ok, whatever passes the time right?"

She nodded and headed in her room walking past her food once again.

"Bye Rei see you next week!" I called inside.

"Bye Horohoro have a good week." I heard her reply.

I continued to visit her.

Slowly she opened up to me, I even started to visit her twice a week, she was very smart, funny and kind.

It was almost hard to believe she needed to be there.

I sat on her bed next to her on one of my two weekly visits.

"I hate it here, someone was in my room last night hiding, screaming, it was unnerving, it's like a carnival of idiots, they parade around here like this is a glorious place and then someone else came in here and started touching me so I hit him with the book and I got in trouble." I noticed the tears welling up in her eyes.

Without thinking I pulled her into my arms.

"Shh… It's ok." I soothed.

She seemed to relax and she did actually hug me back.

"Haru you take these into Rei." A nurse's voice came, she pulled back from me and wiped her eyes.

"Hi Rei, how are you today?" A different nurse asked.

"Hi Haru, you can take them away again, I'm not taking them."

"Please Rei? They'll make you feel better…"

"Nothing can make me feel better." She told him. "I told you yesterday I died a long time ago."

"At least take this one, I couldn't really care about the rest."

"You want me to take it because I'm the best conversation you've got on your sector!" Rei accused.

"You're right I miss our conversations, you're very interesting when your mind is clear."

"It doesn't help, nothing does!" She hissed.

She went to get up, but I put a hand on her shoulder.

"Is one really that bad?" I asked.

"Yes that's the worst one of all!"

"Please Rei?" I asked again.

She looked into my eyes I gave her a smile.

Sighing she held her hand out, Haru placed the orange pill in her hand she placed it on her tongue and swallowed it with some water.

Haru left and I tucked a stray strand of purple hair behind her ear.

"Thank you."

"You owe me a hug."

I laid down on her bed, I didn't mind giving her a hug she laid next to me resting her head on my chest.

I wasn't going to lie it felt quite nice to be this close to someone, laying here like this with her, the only sound was our breath, it was peaceful in her room.


	3. Chapter 3 Ren's Visit

Chapter Three Ren's Visit

One day I even convinced Ren to come with me.

"Wait here." I instructed him before I went into her room.

"Hi Horohoro." She smiled as I sat next to her.

"Hey how are you?"

"I'm good thanks you?"

"Yeah I'm alright, but listen."

"What's wrong?" She asked, I took her hand.

"I brought Ren with me to see you."

"Oh, what's he doing here?" She asked her spirits dropping.

"He came with me to see you."

"Where is he?"

"Outside your room."

"Don't leave me alone with him." She begged cuddling the panda close to her.

"I won't."

I got up and let him in.

He approached her.

"Hey sis."

"Don't touch me." She batted his hand away as he reached to place a hand on her head.

"How have you been?" He asked.

"Great, the food taste like plastic, people are coming in my room all night to do various things and my own brother, the only family member I can actually say I love and cherish left me in here to rot."

I sat on the bed behind her and placed my hands on her shoulders, it always seemed to calm her down.

"Look I'm sorry, Jun came down and you know what she's like."

"Are you still trying to hide me Ren?"

"We've been through this L-"

"Don't call me that!" She barked.

"Ok Rei."

"Don't feel that you have to come here and watch my decay dear brother, I'd rather spend time with someone who wants to see me." She replied curtly.

"I do-"

"You feel guilty for what you did, that's why you're here, you don't care about me otherwise you would have come to see me regardless of whether that bitch was with you, I don't want your crappy sympathy, maybe you should go and see the sister you know and love whose apparently sane."

"Hey, hey..." I soothed rubbing her shoulders.

"Sorry..." She mumbled looking down.

"I know I'm a terrible twin brother, I'm sorry Rei."

The two fell into a silence thicker than an ice block.

"Did finish reading that book I gave you?" I asked.

"Yes I did the ending was very sad."

"I thought that as well, I brought you another one, if you're interested."

"Yes I am, it's so nice to read a book that hasn't had pages torn out or scribbled on and that has comprehensive language I haven't read anything like it in years!" She smiled happily.

"Did you go and read in the garden?" I questioned.

I'd asked her to get out of her room a bit more.

"Just like you asked I found a nice quiet place."

"And the living room?" I quizzed.

"The television was too loud I couldn't think straight so I left but I went and sat in the reception and I was really quiet so they let me sit in there and I've been helping out in the kitchen this week."

I smiled.

"That's great, I'm so happy you're coming out of your room and helping people. Doesn't it help pass the time?" I questioned hoping, praying it did.

"Yes it does."

Now that she'd calmed down I felt I needed to speak to her about Ren.

"Hey Ren can you get us a cup of tea?" I asked.

He nodded and left.

"He is your brother if you don't talk to him he'll never come back."

"I know I'm just-"

I pulled her into a hug, my heart pounding in my chest.

Rei's Pov-

I could feel the heat rise to my cheeks as Horohoro wrapped his arms around me.

"Please, he really is sorry for what he did; give him another chance, please for me?"

"O-Okay I'll try."

Horohoro pulled back, and placed a hand on my cheek.

"Thank you." He smiled.

He was so handsome.

No I couldn't think like that, I wanted Horohoro to come back.

"Horohoro!" Ren called.

Horohoro got up and opened the door, letting Ren in.

He handed me a plastic cup.

"So Ren any good fights lately?" I asked; I had to try for Horohoro.

"Unfortunately no, there's no challenge anymore, you were the only challenge I had."

"Yes we did have some good fights."

"That's true remember when we stayed out really late and we fell asleep outside and Dad yelled because we caught a cold." Ren recalled.

"Dad yelled at us a lot, me more than anyone as if he secretly hated me..."

"Medication!"

I shuddered.

The male nurse entered, the one I knew as Haru, my key worker.

"Hello Ren, it's been awhile since we've seen you here."

"Yeah Ren." I muttered angrily.

The nurse handed me a biscuit.

"New routine?" I asked munching on it.

"Yes, trying to stop you throwing up your medication…" He sat on the bed next to me.

"I can't help it; it makes me feel so sick."

"Maybe if you ate mor-"

"Then give me food that doesn't taste like bland mush and I might eat it." I sulked as he handed me the small pot with pills inside.

"What's that one?" I asked picking up the green capsule.

"Anti-depressant."

"You'd be depressed if you were here for 24 hours of screaming…" I murmured taking it with the plastic cup of water he'd given me.

"What's this?"

"Vitamin supplement."

I took it.

"And this smelly one?" I asked picking up the small tablet that was brown.

"Iron tablet." He told me.

"I didn't know you did medications, have you been training?" I asked normally Haru just tried to get me to take them but knowing the names and what they did must've meant he'd been training.

He laughed.

"Sharp as a tack, yes I have I've gone up in the world." He smiled.

"And these are all correct?" I asked.

"Of course I just did it."

I picked up the one that was supposed to make me 'sane' also the one making me feel sick.

"Hello you orange bastard we meet again. Ok I'll believe you, they look like they usual ones."

I shoved the rest in my mouth and the orange one up my nose and washed them down with the water.

"Take the orange one…"

"I did."

He tapped his foot.

"I swear I have." I lied. "You don't believe me? I am offended would I do something like that to my key worker?"

"Not up your nose again?" He asked.

"Yes sir…" I mumbled pulling it out.

"It makes me feel awful." I whined.

"I know, but you have to take it."

I swallowed it with the last drops of water, my stomach heaved.

"Your pills are mainly just what you would get from food and sunlight, you eat more and you'll take less."

"Everything tastes disgusting…" I frowned as he stood up taking the pill pot and plastic cup with him.

"I know… how about I get you some biscuits for your room? Also do you want your sleeping tablets tonight?"

"Is Nina having a bath tonight?" I asked him.

He nodded.

"Then no she'll be in and out of my room all night, trying to take stuff that's nailed to the floor." I told him

"Why don't you call-"

"I do the night staff get tired of answering it because when they come she's under the bed, or in the bath tub or she's run out of here, I'm tired of looking insane…"

"Hang in there Rei." He ruffled my hair before leaving.

I laid down on my bed I noticed Horohoro still sitting there.

"You guys still here?"

"Of course." Ren smiled.

Horo checked the time.

"Damn, hey Rei-"

"Bye then." I waved not looking at him.

"Come on don't be that way." Ren whined.

"Feel free to come check on my decaying carcass anytime."

"I'll see you soon sis."

"Yeah, yeah…" I closed my eyes.


	4. Chapter 4 The Events

Chapter Four The Events

Horohoro's Pov-

Ren left and Rei had fallen asleep, I laid down beside her and waited.

"No, stay away…" She muttered. "No please leave me alone!"

I sat up.

"Rei…"

"Don't touch me please not again!"

"Rei!" I shook her shoulder.

She shot up like a lightning bolt, her breathing ragged; cold sweat trickled down her face.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"Y-Yeah…" Her hoarse whisper came.

I rubbed her back.

"You always have nightmares?"

She nodded slowly.

"Do you want a hug?" I asked, the fear in her eyes was almost tangible.

"Is that ok?"

I nodded, she sunk into my arms.

"I don't want to be here anymore!" She sobbed. "I've had enough!"

I rubbed her back.

She pulled back and scrubbed her eyes with her hands to dry her tears.

"Hey, hey…" I frowned cupping her cheek.

Her eyes now red raw.

I smoothed my thumb over her cheek, she stared into my eyes.

I'd quickly become her life line, she'd wait for my visits and I'd look forward to see the shine in her eyes when she saw me, I'd love our walks around the garden.

I loved our little talks even if they were about nothing.

Her moments of clarity when with me were constant now.

I hated seeing her upset.

"Oh Rei."

She looked towards the door.

"Tao En!" She gasped.

Ren blinked.

"No it's-"

I jumped up as she darted toward Ren.

"I'll kill you, you bastard!" She screamed.

I grabbed her wrist as she went to stab him with a plastic knife, I grabbed her other hand restraining her but not before she got a slap in.

"It's ok it's only Ren I told her.

"R-Ren…?" She asked, fear struck he turned around and bolted.

Suddenly she burst into tears; I turned her around and wrapped my arms around her.

Without thinking I leant forward and pressed my lips against hers, she jolted slightly before she kissed me back.

Hearing the door open she pulled away.

"Sir visiting hours are now over." The nurse told me.

"Can't I have a few more minutes?" I asked as she went and sat on her bed and hugged the panda close to her.

"I'm afraid not."

"I'll see you soon Rei…" I smiled taking her hand.

"I don't want you to go Horohoro." She frowned, tears welling up in her eyes.

"I know. I don't want to go either, but I'll be back soon, I promise."

She nodded and let my hand go.

"Your annual assessment is coming up Rei." The nurse reminded her as I headed towards the door.

"How could I forget? More pills shoved down my neck."

"Which means all personal items have to be removed for 48 hours."

"No!" She wailed.

"Rei you can have them back in two days." I noticed the nurse take the stuffed animal out of her grip.

"It's my panda!" She sobbed snatching it back.

I looked back as the nurse wrestled the stuffed panda out of her grip.

"Rei regulations state-"

"I don't care it's my panda!" She screamed reaching it for it.

"You can't have the panda for two days you know that."

"It's my panda!"

It broke my heart to see her like that.

She'd once told me the panda reminded her of home, the nice parts anyway.

"Horo gave it to me, I need it!"

Two nurses brushed past me closing her door behind them.

"It's all I have left!" I heard her bellow as I walked down the hallway.

I'd never seen her so upset and it pained me to walk away.

I wanted to go back and wrap her in my arms and tell her everything would be alright, I wanted to hold her until the tears stopped.

I came back a few days later for my regular visit.

"I'd like to visit Rei."

"I'm sorry she's not allowed any visitors right now."

"Why not?" I asked.

The receptionist looked up.

"I'm sorry, are you family?"

"No…"

"Then I'm afraid I can't give out any information."

I stepped outside and sat on the bench, well shit…

"Hello Horohoro here to see Rei?"

It was that nurse that Rei liked.

"No they won't let me."

"I was afraid of that…"

"What's going on?" I asked.

He looked around.

"After they took everything out of her room that were personal items, she screamed and started fighting staff demanding that we gave her, her stuff back and that we wanted it for ourselves."

"I heard her screaming when I left." I remembered.

"She'll be very disappointed when she finds out you aren't allowed in."

"So anyone else can visit her?" I questioned.

"As far as I'm aware, they're stopping her regular visitors to see how she will react and you are the only one that visits her on a regular basis, so the staff have been told not to let you in."

"Why are you telling me all this?" I asked.

"I like Rei, she's really sweet when her mind isn't clouded."

"Is there anything I can do? I mean she'll be even worse if I don't show up."

Once again he looked around.

"If you get someone to come on behalf of you, they could slip her a letter from you, if you decided to write one, with a certain phone number on it, that later tonight she could ring when the two staff aren't around."

He stood up.

I headed home Ayane sat on the sofa.

"Home so soon?" She asked.

"Yeah…"

"Why? You normally stay out until late?" She questioned.

"They wouldn't let me see her."

"See who?"

"Ren's sister." I sighed sitting down.

"That sucks, what's wrong with her?" Ayane asked.

"Apparently they're stopping me from visiting her but everyone else can go and see her."

"That's harsh… Why don't I go visit her instead?"

"Because she'll think I'm not coming." I frowned.

"Write her a note that I can take with me?"

"She'll think I'm not coming anymore."

"Well someone has to visit her bro." Ayane reminded me.

I suppose…

I wrote her a letter, after writing a page; I wrote my phone number on the bottom before putting it in an envelope.

"Where am I going?"

"The local nuthouse just outside of town."

"I'm going to visit a mental patient?" Ayane asked.

"She's not mental… All the time…"

"Ok… What's her name."

"Tao Lei, but call her Rei, at the desk she might be under Tao Rei, and don't let them see the note."

"Ok." She left.

Don't fuck up Ayane… Please…

Rei's Pov-

It was Wednesday, Horohoro's day to visit, but as lunch came my mind started wonder.

Horohoro was always here by twelve p.m. and he stayed until six p.m. twice a week…

Maybe he was getting bored of visiting me, maybe I'd upset him!

I'd given up asking for the panda, they just wouldn't give it to me… My only reminder of him, of home…

"Rei you have a visitor."

I could feel myself light up, I turned around, my happiness dissolved it wasn't Horohoro.

"Ok…"

The girl came in and waited for the nurse to close the door and leave.

"Hi I'm Ayane, I'm Horohoro's sister."

"Horohoro with you?" I asked.

She shook her head.

"Why Horohoro no come?"

"Horohoro very busy."

That's what Horohoro said about Ren.

"Horohoro's never coming back is he?" I asked lowering my head.

"He is."

"No he's not!" Tears welled up my eyes.

"You miss him?" She asked.

I nodded.

"Here Horohoro wanted me to give this to you." She whispered handing me a letter.

"Rei medications."

I shoved the note in my pillowcase.

"I don't want it!" I screamed.

"You have to take your meds."

"No!"

"Rei take your meds!"

"No, no, no!" I refused.

I didn't want to.

"Look this has to stop you need to take these." The nurse shoved the pot in my face.

Growling I knocked it away the pills spilling on the floor.

"Rei take your medication."

"Give me my panda!" I demanded.

"You can't have the sodding panda now take your goddamn pills!"

"I want the panda! Give me the panda, he's mine you have no right to hold him captive!"

"We've been through this, you now have to wait seven more days before Horohoro or the panda are allowed in here."

"But it's Horohoro's day to visit it's not fair!" I protested.

"Maybe this will make you think before you throw bedside tables."

"You deserved it!" I hissed at her. "I'm done with you, leave!" I commanded.

"That's it Rei, no visitors at all until you start taking your meds!"

Ayane stood up.

"Bye Rei."

"Bye Ayane." I waved as she left.

I laid on my bed, growling the nurse left, if Horohoro wrote me a letter I'd need to take the orange one…

Looking on the floor I struggled to find it.

I did eventually it was hiding under the bed.

I dry swallowed it and waited for the swarm of thoughts in my head to calm down, once it had I dug the letter out.

To Rei,

Sorry I am unable to visit you; I hope Ayane is being nice to you.

I hope you're being good and helping out, eating and taking your meds, I know it's hard but the more normal you act the better chance you have of leaving.

You want to get out of here don't you? So if you manage it I'll let you live with me (Instead of Ren because he smells).

I miss you Rei and as soon as they let me visit I'll come and see you, remember that picture we took in the garden?

I printed you out a copy.

I stopped reading and pulled the picture out of the envelope, I sighed contently seeing me and him together I thought of the kiss we shared, the softness of his lips, the tenderness of his touch, the warmth of his embrace, oh how I missed him.

I continued reading.

I really do miss you, in fact I love you Rei and I hope you feel the same, I'll be waiting for your call.

He then wrote his number, I tore off the number and left my room after hiding the picture letter and envelope.

"Can I ring my brother?" I asked the nurse that liked me.

"Sure, do you need the number?" He asked.

"No I remember it."

I dialled the number.

"Hello?"

"Hi is Horohoro there." I whispered.

"Yeah hold on."

"Hello?" He sounded like he'd just woken up, at any rate it was so lovely just hear his voice.

"Hi Ren it's Rei just calling to talk to a human being."

"Hi Rei how are you?" Horohoro responded.

"I'm alright thanks, how's it going?"

"Pretty boring, on your end?"

"Dull, I'm so bored."

"Well hang in there…"

"Hey Horo guess what." I whispered.

"What?"

"I love you too."

"I miss you Rei, I really do."

"I miss you too."

"Rei dinnertime." The nurse told me.

"Oh, ok."

"Thinking of you." Horohoro told me.

"I love you too."

"Be good and leave your window open tonight."

"I will, bye…"


	5. Chapter 5 The Question

Chapter Five The Question

I hung up.

I went into the mess hall and sat down.

"Hi I haven't seen you before." A girl sat down next to me.

"I've been here for five years." I told her.

"Oh I'm sorry!"

I didn't eat much watching people scoop slop was making me feel sick.

Still I promised Horohoro I'd be good so after dinner I went into the sitting room and read a story to a small group of children, soon half of the room was listening, I even played the piano for them.

"Good work today Rei." A nurse smiled as I headed to my room.

I had my bath before I got into bed.

I then remembered Horohoro told me to leave the window open.

So I opened it before climbing in bed.

That night I laid awake, I was just drifting off.

"Psst! Rei!" I heard a sharp whisper.

I stood up and went to the window.

"Hey."

I looked down.

"Horohoro!" I whispered.

I watched him, pull his body weight up, bracing his back against the window he bent the bars just enough so he could fit through.

We laid on the bed together, cuddled up.

"Did you mean it?" I asked him.

"What?"

"When you said you love me?"

"Of course I did."

We kissed and cuddled.

I talked to him about everything he listened quietly.

"I better get going it's five a.m."

"Ok, I'll see you soon though." I smiled as we got dressed.

"Yeah you will."

I gave him a kiss goodbye, before he left bending the bars back to how he found them before he dropped down.

It was a month later; I was walking around with Horohoro, holding his hand, when we saw Ren coming out of the office.

"Ren!" Horohoro called.

"Oh hey Horohoro, can I talk to you? Alone."

"Sure." Horohoro turned to me. "I'll be back in a minute."

"Ok."

I decided to go and talk to Haru, my favourite nurse.

"Hey Rei, what you up to?" He asked.

"Waiting for Horohoro to come back he's talking to my brother."

"What happened to the panda?"

"It's sitting on my desk, I don't know when it came back, I'd give it away but Horohoro gave it to me for my birthday, it's rude to give gifts away that were given to you, don't you think?"

"Yes I do, you seem a lot happier these days."

"Yes I have a lot to be happy about."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah my brief moments of clarity are now constant, my mind is clear and focused, and I feel a lot better in myself."

"Yes I've noticed. They've pushed another review your way." He smiled.

"Oh that's usual normally they don't push for them, let's hope it's not more meds. Speaking of which its lunchtime, got any for me?"

"No none for you."

"That's been happening for a few days now." I told him confused.

"That's a good thing." He reassured me.

"Hey, there you are." Horohoro called.

"Ren not stay?" I asked.

"No he left, he sends his regards." Horohoro told me.

"Oh well shall we go outside and sit for a while?"

"Don't you want any lunch?" He asked.

"You know you don't have to stay here for the whole eight hours, if you've got things to do I don't mind."

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

"I'm not really that hungry I had a big breakfast."

"You ate breakfast?" He asked.

"Yeah, it wasn't half bad."

Horohoro slipped his arm around my waist.

"How's Ayane? She seemed nice." I asked him.

"She's alright, she's dating Ren now."

"Oh, that's nice, I bet he ran off because they had a lunch date, he's always too early." I shook my head slightly.

"Yeah, she said she wanted to pop in and have a cup of tea with you."

"Maybe the four of us could have one sometime in the garden."

"What a nice idea." Horohoro mused.

We sat outside for most of the evening, watching the people here run around.

"Rei?" Horohoro asked after a few hours.

"Yes Horohoro?"

"What would you do if they released you?"

What an odd question.

"Sleep outside until they let me back in?" I asked, confused.

"I'm serious..."

Oh…

"So am I, I have no money, no job, nowhere to go." The harsh truth of my life.

"What about your family?"

"Would you go back there after almost six years? I ran away and descended into madness I don't think I could go back."

"Oh right..."

Horohoro was silent, they only movement was the rise and fall of his chest.

"And at any rate if I went back I wouldn't get to see yo-"

"Rei, marry me."

I sat up.

"What?" I asked.

Horohoro laid there unfazed.

"Marry me Rei." He repeated.

"Isn't there someone more worthy to marry you?"

"You are all I think about every night every day; you make me feel normal, whole."

"I make you feel normal? I'm in a nut house."

He sat up and pulled me on his lap.

"If you didn't marry me I think I'd be joining you in here."

"I don't want you rush into this, I mean I'm your first girlfriend right?"

"And I'm your first boyfriend right?"

"That's different I've had my midlife crisis."

"Then move in with me."

"You are determined, ok if I get out of here I'll move in with you."

"Really?"

"Yes."

Smiling he kissed me.

It started to rain so we headed inside.

My assessment came up and they took everything personal out of my room and Horohoro had days when he wasn't allowed to visit or I could only call him or he was only allowed to see me for a few minutes, none of which really bothered me I'd even given them the letter picture and envelope I'd hidden.

When it was over they brought my stuff back packed in a box,

"Here put these on." The nurse told me.


	6. Chapter 6 The Happy Ending?

Chapter Six The Happy Ending?

"Can I unpack my stuff yet? It's almost dinner time..."

"Pick up your box and come with me."

So I did, she led me to the reception, Ren, Horo and Ayane where waiting for me.

Haru was also standing there, he gave me a hug.

"I'm going to miss you." He told me.

"Why where am I going?"

Horohoro held out his hand, I took it and stood beside him. Ren took the box off me.

"We're leaving." Horohoro told me.

"Oh ok... Bye then." I smiled.

He laughed.

"We're leaving with you, you're being released." Horohoro told me.

"Oh ok... Goodbye everyone."

"Bye Rei." The staff waved as Horohoro led me out the doors.

"Rei!" Someone called.

I looked back; some of the patients were leaning out the windows.

"Bye!" They called. "We'll miss you!"

"Bye!" I waved as I passed the gates.

"So now that this joke is over, can I go back and unpack my stuff? It really is time for dinner." I asked Horohoro.

"You can when we get home, you still want to live with me right?"

I nodded.

Horohoro let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him.

"Good."

We stopped at a place for dinner Ren ordered for me.

When it came I wasn't sure, Horohoro tried some.

"It's nice, have a bite." He offered picking up some up with the metal utensil.

A blush crept along my face as he fed it to me, he was right it did taste nice.

After we ate we headed out again.

We got to a small house.

"See you guys tomorrow." Ren smiled giving Horohoro the box.

"Yeah."

"Bye Rei!" Ayane waved as they started to walk away.

"Bye…"

That was all I seemed to be saying today…

We went inside.

"Want a bath?"

"Ok…"

He ran me one.

"I'm going to make the bed."

He left, I stood there, was I supposed to get in?

I looked around finding the room empty.

I stripped off and got in.

I sat and waited.

"Horohoro!" I called after fifteen minutes.

He poked his head in the door.

"Yeah?"

"Errm… well…" I trailed off looking down.

"Want me to get in with you?" He asked.

"Can you do that?" I asked looking around.

"Yeah or you can bathe alone if you want."

"N-No…"

Smiling Horohoro got undressed and got in.

"So how does this work?"

"You get yourself washed and you get out."

Do it myself?

"You looked confused…"

"Well the nurses did everything…"

So Horohoro showed me how to do everything we then got out and got changed into nightwear, which apparently was different to clothes you wore during the day.

"Want to go to bed?" He asked.

I nodded I was tired.

I got in the huge bed.

Horohoro got in the other side.

"You're allowed to stay?"

"I live with you…" He told me calmly.

Oh…

I snuggled up to him.

A week later…

In the morning I woke up and stretched.

I sat up I'd been living with him for seven days now.

"What's wrong?" Horohoro asked, yawning.

"I'm really not going back am I?" I questioned him.

He sat up.

"No, you aren't."

Tears welled up in my eyes, I was free.

Horohoro wrapped his arms around me, I looked up at him my eyes thick with tears, I melted into his warm embrace and lightly he pressed his lips against mine.

My salvation, my hero, my love, my world…


End file.
